The Daily Orange's December Giving Tuesday. Help the Daily Orange reach our goal of $25,000 this December


Stpors fnas lvoe to asumse

Aoccdrnig to rseearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, the ltteers in a wrod can be in amlsot any psosilbe oredr, so lnog as the frist and lsat ltteers are in the rghit pclae. In fcat, eryveihtng esle can be a total mses, and you can sitll raed the wrod wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but rahter, the wrod as a wlohe. To be mroe derict, the huamn mnid is csotntlany assimung. It tkaes samll peiecs of imfornaotin and fllis in the gaps. Taht’s why you can raed tihs sntenece, and thsoe snteneces that cmae berofe it, and the mnay snteneces taht wlil flloow as tihs cuolmn reaehcs its grpiping cnolcusion.

Tihs Cmabrigde stduy is vrey ncie – and eevn btteer, deson’t it mkae you feel excetpinaolly srmat? But the turth is, we, as sprots fans, kenw all aolng aoubt this assmue-evreyinhtg cluutre. In sprots, we wacth and assmue simaneultosluy. We gzae, corss-eyed, at our bloveed lttile sprots wlrod, and wiat for the nxet sprurise to revael itslef, all wilhe gssueing and prdeciting waht knid of Mgaic Eye image we’ll see nxet.

Assimung, it shulod be noetd, cmoes wtih a dagner: as the syiang geos, it mkaes an ass out of U and ME. But olny a sprots fan – a loyal Uinervtisy of Maine fowoller, phaerps – can mkae an ass, at once, out of U and ME and UME.

Yet it’s ntohing to be ahsaemd of, beucase in sprots, evryenoe assuems, even the alethtes. On pnaelty kciks, sccoer gaolies assuem the dictreion of the shot. In bsaeball gmaes, bttaers asusme the nxet pcith tehy’ll see. From the fiarway, glfeors assuem waht club to use nxet. In the clssoraom, clolege pfroessors asusme that the star qtruareback worte taht term paper all by hmieslf.



Of cruose, we shulod all konw btteer tehse days. Noobdy assuems corcretly. The lone cnotsant in our lives is the endelss line of SprotsCnteer rebraodcsats that sits, like an immvobale steel baem, arcoss evrey page of the TV Gduie litsnigs. Atfer taht, nthiong in sprots is a ceritanty.

You’ll thnik you’ve seen it all, and tehn – acabradabra! – a NCASAR divrer spaeks a gramaticmally crorect sntenece. An NBA palyer vcoies oppotiosin for leglizaing majuarina. A hckoey palyer goes a saeosn wouhtit dtenal wrok. No dbuot, sprots fans will try to geuss waht will hpapen nxet, and some ppeole will even asusme tehy know. But bwaree: tihs can lead to porbelms. Jsut ask aynnoe who uses www.sportsbook.com as his or her Inretnet strat-up page.

If I’d pacled bets piorr to Syrusace’s 2003 fotbaoll saeosn, I’d hvae assuemd taht the Oangermen, as imlpied by the seven mlddie ltteers of thier Cmabrigde-ized name, wolud spimly anger me. I forasew athoner poor saeson. I woludn’t have gseused taht Wtlaer Ryees mgiht draw ealry-saeson montiens as a Hiesamn cdiandate, or that R.J. Adernson wolud go four strgiaht gmaes wouthit thworing an intrceetpion.

And waht about SU’s female taems, the Owageronemn? At the benngiing of the smeteser, I wolud have raed rhgit over thier name, as you leikly jsut did, wouthit hvaing even a clue about the msesgae wrppaed isnide the ‘O’ and the ‘N.’ But alaerdy, the sccoer team is 7-2, and the vllyeoball team is 11-6, and the filed hckoey team is… well – OK, now dno’t wager on (ITALICS)tehm(ITALICS).

As assuemrs, lcoal sprots fans are lsouy but lyoal. Even tihs smumer, we foesraw a ftuure wtih Syrusace in the ACC. In dcedinig wtheher or not to pruhcase fotboall saeson tkciets, we etiher elcteed agniast it (figrinug we’d be able to wtach the team on teleisivon) or elcteed for it (figrinug we’d get to see a good team like Ntore Dmae). Thnaks to a 1-3 strat by the Irsih and a 1-for-4 start by Time Wnarer, both assptumions have alrdaey been porven worng.

Assminug inrrcoectly is a rsik taht evryenoe in sprots – from bookies to rookies – msut live wtih. At tihs piont, the Cmabridge stduy amlsot mkaes good snese: We raed in the smae mnaner taht we wtach sprots, and we wtach sprots in the smae mnaner that we live. Olny qutseion left is, how on ertah did tehy dcoisver tihs at a scoohl wouthit a fotboall taem?

-30-

Cicho Hlaarn is a staff writer for The Daily Orange, where his columns appear each Tuesday. E-mail him at apharlan@syr.edu





Top Stories